FROM: Prince Babar TO: You

FROM: Prince Babar
TO: You

Hello, I hope this finds you well. My name is Babar. I am from a big community in Kenya called Eshisiru. My town is called Kakamega. It is located in the Western part of Kenya, close to the part where the line that separates my country Kenya from the Uganda. My parents told me to not go too close this line because, on the other side, there are people who eat other people. They are called Bangalla. I wonder how hungry they are. I would recommend them to WFP.

My village is next to River Isiukhu. Here, we fetch our domestic water, give water to our cows and cleanse our bodies. The men wash themselves upstream and the girls and women do it somewhere down along. Usually, we are not supposed to meet during the bathing times, but, some of the men meet their future wives in the bushes in between and do bad things. I don’t do that myself, I fear curses from the women’s old fathers and grandfathers. Beyond River Isiukhu is a forest. This forest is where my fellow khavalanga-mates and got sacrificed, you know, the ritual where they cut off the tip of a boy’s manhood to make him a man?

Eshisiru has a ruler. The King. Other people address him as King Chacha the Fourth; I call him Father because I am the product of his loins. Before him, were my grandfather and his father before him. I am from the Kavalaya family. Basically, we are what the white men from the aero planes would call the Royal Family. We are The Kavalayas, like THE kARDASHIANS, but black. In case you wonder how we got tasked with the responsibility of leadership, it is mostly due to the fact that our family is known to only produce male offspring who, in our great community, are naturally born to lead. The official story, however, is that my great great grandfather, Khavalanga the First, invaded the original community that lived in this area at the beginning of the colonization of the white people, he was a collaborator.

Recently, my father passed on. I am supposed to ascend to power but due to the wickedness of the greedy brother of my father, Abonande, my life is in danger. You see, he has always been jealous of my father’s prosperity as King over my community. All he wants is to firmly install one of his many sons to the throne to succeed my father. Recently, he was seen to have crossed the line that separates my country, Kenya from the Uganda. It is now rumored that he plans to involve the flesh eating community from that side to eat me off the face of the earth.

Customs dictate that once the heir to the throne loses his life, or is no longer present after being searched for for a week, the throne descends to the next in line, who in this case is the first-born son of the brother of my father.

From the recent events, I am now convinced that I am going to be killed for my position. I therefore need your help to save my life. If you choose to accept, my community and I as heir to the throne will be highly indebted to you. The community I lead is full of riches. I am willing to send you a total sum of 3,000,000 American Dollars for you to facilitate my escape from this country to yours. All you have to do is to reply to this email with your bank account number for me to deposit the amount into your bank. For your generosity, I offer you twenty percent of the transferred sum.
Moreover, to prove your trustworthiness, I need you to send me 100 American Dollars to my PayPal email address stereotypemuch?

May the gods keep you and your family
Prince Babar

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